Digestif

by Alli Harris

“‘So Alli, what’s your bliss?’ - Jillian Keiley asks me through the screen of her computer. Weirdly enough, this has always been a very easy question for me. My bliss is connection, it's creating things with people I love, laughing, and being enraptured with my work. I feel grateful that I know this.”

Alli Harris was one of five participants in Fresh Meat’s first ever paid online training program offered in October 2020. Participants were paid a professional fee to participate in a series of training workshops designed to help build a sustainable artistic practice in Ottawa. At the close of the program, we invited them to reflect on what they had learned, and what it meant for their own artistic journey, and create a digital offering for our community. Each piece is as unique as the artist who created it: some made short films, some made slide shows, while others channeled their thoughts into writing or podcasts.

You can read Alli’s offering below.

November 3, 2020

Top 6 Reasons to Attend an Online Festival In A Pandemic

Alli Harris

David Letterman was never my favourite late-night host. I’ll be honest, I never got it. This is a controversial opinion and I know people are coming for me. And yes, I’m sure you can conflate this to me being a millennial. I will always and forever be a Conan O’Brien fanatic. You can ask Cat (my girlfriend) who I’ve now forced to watch all available online clips of Conan. She’ll never get those hours of her life back.

I will however say, I did love David Letterman’s Top 10 List. Always funny. Zinger heaven. ROFLcopters everywhere.

In loving memory of David Letterman's Top Tens (he’s not dead, just on Netflix) here’s my top SIX (and yes I know it's less than 10, they’re longer... don’t be like that.) takeaways from attending an online festival in a pandemic...

Band plays, roaring applause, light laughter, and general chatter.

“Here’s your TOP SIX Takeaways From Attending An Online Festival in a Pandemic!”

Band plays again, HEAVY laughter, a real “Oh BOY, here it comes!” feeling...

6.) “If the path before you is clear, you're probably on someone else's.” -Joseph Campell. “Carving your Path and Finding Your Voice” with Jillian Keiley .

I know you’re thinking “So now what? I should do a U-turn and drive into oncoming traffic? ” Well no, and yes, but also no. Please don’t do that. But if you get so caught up in the semantics of your path and your future, you sometimes miss what’s right in front of you, and what is best for you. Sometimes that thing that you think is exactly for you is..well..not. Jillian's focus on this during the workshop was a gentle reminder and beautiful reassurance.

Truthfully, I learned this a while ago. I’ve had opportunities that I thought would be flourishing and fantastic that have turned sour. I’ve had experiences that I thought would be without value and silly, but have been some of the most enlightening. Over the years of not getting gigs I just KNEW were perfect for me, I settled into following my gut and doing my best with what's right in front of me. Like, when you’re asked to play the car in “Grease” in theatre school (yes, I mean literally like being a part of the car, like a carburetor. Side note: I would also like to mention they couldn’t even manage to put me in Summer Nights. Once a trunk lid, always a trunk lid.). You wear those reflective strips like it's your god damn destiny, it may just be the most fun you have. It was.

5.) “Track Your Jokes.” - Dramaturgy with Emily Pearlman

“But that will kill my comedy!” “ I can’t just analyze my jokes, they won’t be funny anymore!”

I’m embarrassed to admit, I’ve never done this. I’ve never tracked each of my jokes in a show I’ve written, or that I've been a part of. Whether that's just straight-up laziness or the fear of truly picking a part of my own material and finding out that I’m not as witty as I think I am. When Emily said this, it hit me like a ton of bricks. It’s simple, but it really gives you an idea of how your piece comes across. Why do you have so many colonoscopy jokes here and not enough bear attack puns there? You keep referencing Annette Benning, why are you doing that? And yes, your script is formatted in the shape of a penis, but did you know that doesn't read when you perform it?

When you look at your work, and you’re wondering, “why am I not getting that grant? Why didn’t I get into that festival? Why does no one love me?” One answer might be because your work lacks this kind of thorough analysis. Action each beat, each scene, each moment, break it down. Assess what that means to your piece, as a whole. Good things require great detail. Know your work, know why. Find your why! This was a big take away from all the workshops. Because If you can’t figure out what you’re saying about yourself, how the hell can somebody else?

You better werq.

4.) Anything can be a writing prompt! “Solo Voice(s)” with Jeff Ho

Anything? Anything can be a prompt? Even my Dyson V7 Motorhead Origin Cordless Stick Vacuum Iron? Yes son, even that.

Jeff issued the group a series of writing prompts to create various formats of writing. We wrote monologues, we wrote scenes, we wrote pieces... He took what we liked, he took our favourite songs, and he took our hearts. For me, he unlocked the idea that writing prompts are truly anywhere. He suggested looking at a picture and writing from that...it's….it’s that..easy?!

I often go on this mental gymnastics journey before I begin to create or write. Everything must line up. My time, my mental state, my morning supplements. I must be at peak creativity. I must have eaten lunch and not be hungry. My bathroom break must have been 10 minutes prior, I must have nail polish on and be sitting on the north side of my apartment. The sun must be hitting my house, but not too much! My creative being needs sunscreen! Sometimes, it feels like you are waiting forever to get the inspiration to start creating.

You just need to do it! Get a couple of exercises that are simple. Look at a picture, write about it. Take a random sentence, write a monologue about it. It’s all there, baby!

Taking part in these writing prompts with Jeff and sharing them with our group, really helped me actualize that the practice of writing from a simple prompt is valuable and tangible. This workshop felt electric. Hearing other people’s minds and creative thoughts was enthralling. This workshop was a big spark for me, a real “power bar” with 5 different appliances plugged in all at once.

3.) “We are not post-colonial.” Exploring Anti-Oppression in Creative Spaces, with Fae Johnstone and Jade Byard Peek

This workshop was fantastic. I cannot recommend Jade and Fae enough. They were so knowledgeable and open, and I will be thinking about this workshop for weeks to come. Something that struck me during the workshop is the idea that we are not post-colonial. This is not a new idea, but this really resonated with me during the workshop. In Canada, we are constantly in a state of saying “Well, at least we’re not America!” I’ve said things like that. This is harmful. It’s inactive and it allows us to sit back rather than treat the oppressive crises within our nation. We are not yet at the point where we can look back and say “Things are different now.” We should always be working toward the empowerment of those who are suffering from oppression.

2.) “Work backwards from your event” - Marketing 101 with Madeleine Hall, Sam Woods, and guests.

I’ve been wearing my shirt backwards for years and finally felt validated.

No really, this was something Madeleine said in passing, that I had never tried. Work backwards from your event. Post-workshop, I created 3 different flow charts tracking from 3 upcoming events and goals that I have planned. It occurred to me that I could truly tackle all small aspects of a project or goal by doing this. This idea hit me at that moment and I’m grateful for it.

1.)“GET IN TOUCH WITH US! WE WANT TO HELP YOU!” - Everyone.

God, does everyone have to be so helpful? It’s like they WANT us to succeed or something. What-ever. No really, literally every person who was part of this weekend said “Contact us!” “We are happy to help!”, “We can look at your grant!” , “We can give you feedback!”, “ We will cook you dinner!” Maybe not the last one, but I want people to know that I accept free food.

Sometimes, this business can feel isolating. It can feel like there are the people who’ve made it and then there's you. You can feel like you’ve heard so many “No’s” that you don’t even know what “Yes” means.

Yes (/yes/); used to give an affirmative response. "Example “Do you understand?” “Yes.”"

Ahh, I remember it now.

Honestly, It can feel like everyone is out for themselves and you better toughen up or get out. But, this weekend was the opposite of that.

My sweet, baby angel, Brene Brown says “I assume that people are doing their best. It keeps me out of judgment and lets me focus on what is, and not what should or could be” I believe it. This weekend was a great reminder that most people want to help you succeed, wherever you are at. Perhaps, they’re so helpful because it’s respect for the journey. Perhaps, they know what it's like to be you. Perhaps, it's because Fresh Meat sweetened their deal with an offer code for a HelloFresh Subscription? I dunno, use the code FRESHMEAT and check. Maybe it's not all the time, but most of the time, I like to think people are rooting for you.

Thank you folks, and GOODNIGHT!

Band plays, thunderous applause, slow fade back as the host talks to the musicians.

I want to thank Fresh Meat for this fantastic opportunity and all their hard work. Along with all of the amazing people who hosted the workshops, everyone was incredibly knowledgeable and kind-hearted.

I also want to thank Shanice, Maryse, Kel, and Allison. It was a pleasure to go on this ride with you! I learned just as much from you all.

“So Alli, what’s your bliss?” - Jillian Keiley asks me through the screen of her computer. Weirdly enough, this has always been a very easy question for me. My bliss is connection, it's creating things with people I love, laughing, and being enraptured with my work. I feel grateful that I know this. I think If I didn’t, there wouldn’t be much reason for me to pursue a life in the arts. Trust me, If I could work any other job, I definitely would. If I wasn’t so absolutely obsessed with this field, I would be a tax attorney.

But here I am and I’m not mad about it.